well, i honestly have had a "profound" week for me personally. on several different levels- emotionally, creatively, spiritually, and even materially. several things, all important in their own way, have happened....
for one, the Russells will be moving up in the tech world by way of an ipad soon, which was kinda a hard thing for me- i feel slightly guilty about getting one. why? i don't know! maybe because these things we really could all do without, when it comes down to it. but having different "jobs" in my life, it will help me out in a variety of ways. i see it as a tool and sort of a second laptop. which is GREAT for me, as a homeschooling mom. there are a gazillion different apps that my kids can use for educational purposes. i'm amazed at what is available, and a lot are free or around a dollar. very exciting- we are ALL excited about this purchase (which came about because Rich sold his other mandolin...so basically, he got ME an ipad for HIS Father's Day..hahah!!!what a generous soul!).
i "more-than-likely" will be upgrading my camera VERY SOON because of my very generous husband....who sees this as an important key right now for several upcoming things in our lives. again, this is going to be a purchase that will not be taken lightly. the guilty feeling? slightly, but knowing that this camera, and whatever photography skill i posess because of the graciousness of God, will be used for HIS glory, not mine. and i continue to pray...so be it.
there is also a creative "secret" that i can't tell yet but will reveal soon....let me tell you- i'm honored, and a bit intimidated!!!!!! but, for lack of a better phrase, it was a dream come true! and hopefully a stepping stone for me to feel more confident as an artist/crafter!
and finally, probably the most profound thing of the week..well....i can't disclose the actual thing yet, but i will disclose bits and pieces of the range of emotions i have felt this week because of God's leading. let me tell you- to be led this way by Him, is just......unbelieveable. unfathomable. challenging. awesome.
i don't know where to begin.
i can't even TELL you exactly what it is, here on my blog, because it's still a seed growing, so to speak. but it's HUGE for me, and in turn, affects my wonderful, self sacrificing husband, and three children.
but, i can say these things: God DOES speak to us, even in 2010. i cannot tell you when He has spoken this clear to me. every which way this week, He spoke. through scripture, through my husband, through my dear friends, through random postings by others on a couple forums, and through my pastor and his wife, through several others from our church, and through dear, sweet, well known author, Beth Moore...by way of her Bible study on Esther. try as i may, i have not been able to let go of His words to me. i've sat and cried last Sunday through a specific presentation. that was the beginning. i've shared with my husband the thoughts from that. i've cried some more. i've listened. i've questioned. i'm willing. it's scary, but i. am. willing.
i am beginning to understand how He gives us the desires of our heart. that has always been a favorite verse of mine, you know...Psalm 37:4. i am beginning to see how He has prepared my studies and abilities....and how those things that i have always desired could possibly come true even now as a stay at home, homeschooling mom to three children. i see my husband's manner about him as a big key to this evolving opportunity. and i do understand that even with all these promptings, i need to follow closely by Him to make sure all is right...and honestly, there are many questions, even fears i have.
but the most overwhelming part to this profound week is the overwhelming presence of God's spirit in my heart, soul, and mind. not the thing He is asking me to do. but Him himself. and that...well, i see as a blessing. a comfort, even admist the questions i have and others may have when the time comes.
so let this post be a time to prepare hearts...and know that God is in control. He can do things unimaginable. the impossible. with someone that wasn't expecting it. with someone that has weaknesses. the time will come when what i am talking about will be revealed (i don't feel it is time yet..... but i did feel the need to express how great God is!!!), but for now..please be in prayer for me. for my family.
blessings!
oh! and here is a photo of my lovely Ella girl in her new Brownie uniform on Memorial Day. almost forgot that i had a pic to share!
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