aware

i'm trying to be more aware of my responses to my children. do i show care and concern when there are things that bother or even excite them? do i respond carelessly to their cares? oh, yes i do. i humbly admit it. it is a trying thing for me, personally. not all the time, of course, but when things are trying to get done or cleaned up, yes. like today, when i was directing my sweet daughter with cleaning her room, i went overboard on how i would clean her room and mentioned all these (silly) little things that (mattered) to me. i won't list them- they are just standard kid things, but that is a sore spot for me- ridding up rooms. i get in this mindset and that is all i can concentrate on. i caught myself and ended up trying to nicely help my wonderful daughter with her books, clothes, toys, and closet stuff. i know she appreciated it. i apologized. she was smiley. she ended up after all the room cleaning tonight saying her room is a secret clubhouse and she made rules up. lol. i saw her make up her bed with delightful pillows, soft blankets, special dolls, cuddly animals. she placed her new library card where she won't lose it. she refound her dress up items (and shared with her brother later on). she let her baby brother come in to investigate, too. she told me that she will take care of her room even more than she usually does. i think she will. now if I can only practice what a preach. i told rich tonight i help everyone else and then look at me! i have my own clothes to put away STILL. life.

i am more aware of when to push my firstborn son with his education. he enjoys writing letters. knowing and seeing that he is learning important stuff. having special books for his learning. we started a steno notebook with the words that he knows. so far, cat, pan, Philip, fork, bag. LOL. oh, there's more yes but that's how many he wrote in there. he made his own little book too with some construction paper and also my hole puncher, and my string stash. so did ella. it was a fun project to see them do. they also spread out all the cushions of the couch to make "beds" for themselves and their animals. will david had a blast with that! he also waved and waved and waved his little hands alllllllll day today. and i mean, alllllllll day. to all of us just sitting around. to the window. to cars outside. to daddy coming home and then leaving again. to noone in particular while he was eating in his highchair. just such a cute stage of life that i want to bottle up and never ever let go.

i think that is why i decided to blog tonight. there were so many things the kids did today that struck chords in my heart. yes, there were some trying times, but for the most part, a delightful regular homeschooling day.

a very sweet and contemplative little boy wearing a favorite little spotted-eye, brown floppy eared doggy! i can't believe how much he's changed the past two weeks. it's exciting even though it is bittersweet to me. a mommy's heart goes through a lot, and this is one thing that is very difficult for me- to see him growing up, my baby.

blessings....